Dwindling hopes for VBAC

Background: I'm 24 weeks with #2, type 1 diabetes, induced with #1 at 38 weeks with rupture of membranes and pitocin, baby showed signs of fetal distress, 16 hours of labor ended with a c-section and baby spent 3 days in NICU until his blood sugars stabilized.

Earlier today I had my regular check up with my OB and was able to further discuss labor/induction plans with her.

In a nutshell, this is what she said:

1) The perinatology department handles all of my prenatal testing and she listens to them as far as when she should induce. If my bishops score is favorable she's fine with induction. If not, she'd strongly encourage a repeat c-section.

2) I was originally told at my 20 week anatomy scan that I'd have ultrasounds at 28 weeks, then every 4 weeks after that until I deliver. (note: my first pregnancy I had 20 week, 24 week ONLY because baby wasn't cooperating for some pictures, and 36 week for size, which they were almost exactly accurate on). Today she said I was supposed to have one at 24 weeks, and I had to squeeze one in at the end of this week. I'll start having NST's at 32 weeks, which is on par with my first pregnancy.

3) With my son I carried high and he never dropped. My mom was the same way with me (she wasn't diabetic) and as she puts it, "You didn't drop until I was 10cm. You came out so fast the midwife had to drop everything to catch you." My OB said the baby never dropped because he was "too big." He was 9lbs 1oz. Non-diabetics have larger babies than that. He didn't drop because I didn't know how to labor and got the epidural too soon.

4) She said any baby measuring 9.5lbs or larger she would strongly recommend a repeat c-section. (my first OB said he wouldn't discuss it until 10lbs)

5) She joked it would be easier on her schedule if I had a c-section. I initially laughed with her, and as bad as it is to say that, I do at least appreciate her honesty. But it does bother me.

6) I can't have cervadil with a VBAC and she said minimal pitocin is okay, as well as breaking waters. She said she'd prefer me to go into labor on my own (duh, so would I) and depending on how things go she could let me go as long as 39 weeks before inducing (most OB's push for 38 weeks with diabetics). The women in my family have a history of going past their due dates (my mom was 42+ weeks with me) so that extra week could make the difference.

7) She isn't going to measure fundal height at all in my pregnancy, but instead rely on ultrasounds and physically feeling for size. She's been very accurate with size so far (at my first appointment she estimated I wasn't as far along as I thought I was, and that was confirmed with ultrasound) so in that regard I'd trust her.

I realize I don't have to consent to anything but at this point I don't know if my OB would be telling me to have a c-section because I really needed it or because she wants to go home. I enjoy the chance to have extra peeks at my baby throughout the pregnancy. But the extra testing is not only throwing up a red flag, it's expensive. I don't want to risk my/my baby's health to avoid a c-section, but I don't want unnecessary medical procedures either, especially major surgery. Not only is it expensive but not being able to hold my son right away, I feel, greatly contributed to my severe PPD. I was in a lot of pain last time, had complications (4 day hospital stay) and my husband is only getting 2 weeks off of work again. That was fine with baby #1 but with a 2.5 year old and a newborn and healing from major surgery... that isn't going to fly.


With all of that said, I think it's time to find a new OB. I was thinking of switching to a baby friendly hospital anyway (which would require changing OB's). I'm going on a tour of my current hospital in the morning to satisfy my husband. He likes the current hospital because it's a mile from our house which will make it easier for visiting with our son, whereas the baby friendly hospital is a good 25-30 minute commute, more with heavy traffic. After the tour tomorrow I plan on calling the baby friendly hospital and scheduling a tour asap. I've already been in contact with a few nurses to make sure their lower level NICU can handle diabetes complications (which it can) so I'm feeling good already.

My question is... How do I find a new OB who is VBAC friendly? I have one friend who delivered at that hospital and she wasn't high risk. I already checked and her OB doesn't do high risk. Everyone else I know delivered at the hospital I hate and only one was high risk (she loved the hospital but her thoughts on delivery/child rearing are WAY different than mine). I can call offices and see if their doctors do VBAC's but it's going to come down to individual situations. Do I just have to schedule regular new patient appointments to meet with the doctors and hear what they have to say? Because that could get expensive. My other thought was to just ask the nurse giving me the labor and delivery tour for names of OB's they like. Is that... weird, or out of line? I know of one active message board online for my area to post in. Other ideas? I'll also happily take productive commentary, words of advice, encouragement, other things I should think about, stuff to ask on a tour, etc. Also, success stories of VBAC's with an induction? I feel like I'm more limited on induction methods (can't use cervadil, minimal pitocin) because of the risk of ruptured membranes (EDIT: uterus... ruptured uterus. obviously the membranes rupture... ugh haha). I've been on spinning babies and have been doing stuff to help with positioning, etc. already, but at the end of the day if my body isn't ready, it just won't make a difference :-/